


The Toaster

by 2shy2call911



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Crack, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, Itacest, M/M, Sibling Incest, Smut, Toasters, do italians even use toasters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 10:25:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6952888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2shy2call911/pseuds/2shy2call911
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Romano does some very inappropriate things to a toaster.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Toaster

**Author's Note:**

> OH GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE I WROTE THIS I JUST  
> started as crack then turned into smut  
> pls dont read this  
> also no toasters were harmed in the making of this fanfic  
> probably  
> whenwilliwriteaseriousfanfiction?

This was quite possibly the most embarrassing moment of his entire life, which said a lot considering the fact that he was hundreds of years old.

 

For some reason, Romano had thought it would be a good idea to stick his dick in a toaster. He didn't know what the hell came over him (actually he did, but he'd never admit to himself that he had a toaster fetish), but he did it, somehow cramming himself into the tiny thing. That was a big mistake.

 

First, he couldn't make toast with his dick in the way. He didn't even like toast all that much, but it was better than eating his own genitalia. Also potatoes. Fuck potatoes.

 

Second, he was stuck. It made no sense whatsoever that he could get inside, yet not out, but he was stuck and there was nothing he could do about it. He'd spent the past half hour pulling on the toaster, but all it did was hurt like a bitch. It wouldn't budge and the pain definitely wasn't worth it.

 

And to top things off, his brother suddenly came in the room, humming quietly to himself. When he noticed Romano, he went silent, blinking in confusion.

 

"Romano, why are you naked?"

 

"I'm sitting on the floor with a toaster for a penis and that's the first thing you ask me?" Romano huffed. Though masked with anger, he was mortified. _Of course_ Veneziano just had to come in, out of all times.

 

"Huh?" The younger made a quiet noise of confusion before glancing down to the toaster. He looked at Romano, then the toaster, then back at Romano, then back at the toaster again. He then began to panic. "Are you okay? Does it hurt? Are you bleeding? Can you get it off? Do you want me to cal-"

 

"No!" Romano snapped, halting the other who was running to grab the phone. Veneziano turned to him and Romano only glared. "You aren't calling up any perverted nations to molest me via kitchen appliance!"

 

Veneziano frowned, hesitantly stepping back into the kitchen. He looked down at his brother on the floor, who sat naked, legs spread, and like they had just been discussing, with a toaster for a penis. It went all the way up, stopping just underneath his balls.

 

Romano felt himself flush as Veneziano examined him, and he looked away quickly. "Just..." A pause as he admitted defeat. "Get over here and help me, dammit."

 

Veneziano hurried over, sitting down on his knees next to Romano. He looked at the toaster questionably before speaking. "Have you tried getting it off?"

 

Romano snorted. "I didn't sit here waiting for someone to do it for me."

 

Veneziano didn't reply, only leaning forward to get a closer look. Then he gripped the sides of the toaster, giving it a gentle tug.

 

"Fuck!" Romano hissed, pushing the younger away lightly and proceeding to glare at him. "Not like that, my God."

 

Veneziano looked up, smiling guiltily. "Sorry!" Then he grabbed the toaster again, tugging it even gentler than before. He shifted it up, then forward, with the tiny amount of space left, before pulling it towards himself.

 

"It's working!" He suddenly chirped, looking down at the toaster. "Well, kinda..." It had come off, only about a centimeter, but it was still progress.

 

"Great," Romano muttered, shifting uncomfortably. "Just hurry up."

 

Veneziano nodded, a bit less nervous than before. He looked back down, and repeated the earlier process, pushing the toaster forwards lightly, then pulling it back towards himself again. Romano felt his breath hitch as he got hit with a pang of pleasure. A sigh escaped his lips, but the younger didn't seem to notice.

 

 _What...?_ He was, once again, mortified as he realized he was getting turned on from the toaster. As Veneziano pushed the toaster up, his head pressed lightly against the toaster's walls, and being pulled back down, they stroked his entire length. At first it had really hurt, but this was probably **worse** than that.

 

The fourth time, Veneziano moved the toaster a bit rougher than expected. Romano didn't have enough time to even think as a moan escaped.

 

"Ahh..."

 

It was quiet, but not quiet enough to go unnoticed. Veneziano looked up, blinking in confusion. "What was...?" A light blush spread across his face as he realized what he was just doing to his brother. He saw the lustful look on the elder's face, head tilted back and eyes shut, lips parted slightly and cheeks tinted red. Veneziano felt himself slowly becoming aroused.

 

Leaning forward, he pecked Romano's lips quickly, before repeating his action with the toaster. Forwards, then backwards. Romano bit his lip. Fuck. Veneziano probably thought he was weird now. Who the hell gets turned on by a toaster? Ugh...

 

The younger continued the process, taking his free hand and resting it against Romano's balls, squeezing them gently.

 

" _Ngh-!_ "

 

Veneziano laughed softly to himself, giving another squeeze. Romano swallowed, beginning to taste blood. He felt himself spread his legs and Veneziano gave a small noise of appreciation. Was he really giving into this? No, he wasn't. He-

 

"F-Fuck," he gasped, squeezing his eyes shut, involuntarily bucking his hips forward. It should have hurt and it _did_ but it also felt _so good_.

 

He looked down at Veneziano who had a small smirk on his face. Romano huffed suddenly, trying to push him away as if it'd save his pride. "What do you think you're doing?" He snapped, though weakly, as pleasure and heat formed between his legs.

 

Veneziano wasn't fazed, just looked up and smiled gently. "Trying to get it off," he responded, in his usual, innocent voice. Before Romano could do anything, he grabbed the toaster once more, sliding it up then down on Romano, who arched his back, clenching his fist.

 

"Well..." Veneziano trailed off quietly. At the same time, he began moving the toaster faster, continuing to massage Romano's balls. In the same innocent tone, he said, "I'm trying to get **you** off."

 

" _Oh..._ " Romano moaned, unable to hold back. "Fuck..." His brother's words caused a searing warmth in his crotch, and he found himself beginning to give into the pleasure.

 

Veneziano had the toaster about halfway off, which was good. Even better was how nice Romano's moans sounded, as much as he tried to muffle them. Soft, sharp gasps and stubborn groans he just couldn't keep back. Veneziano felt heat pooling between his legs, but he focused on taking care of his brother first.

 

He leaned forward, brushing his lips against the other's. "Let it out, fratello." It was said in a whisper.

 

 _I'm weak..._ This was Romano's last thought before he gave into the pleasure. He spread his legs all the way, tilting his head back with a sigh. He knew his brother was watching but he no longer even cared. " _Mmm,_ faster..."

 

The younger obliged, moving the toaster quickly up and down. He couldn't really go any faster without hurting the other, and that was the last thing he wanted. Instead, he took his hand away from Romano's balls, moving it up to rest on his head. Then he gently tugged his curl. Having one of his own, he knew exactly how _amazing_ it felt if done right.

 

"Ven- Ahh..." Again, Romano involuntarily bucked his hips forward. Veneziano ran a finger over his curl and it was becoming too much to handle as he found himself growing closer to the edge.

 

No longer did he care that he was practically fucking a toaster. No longer did he care about his brother's watchful gaze, he knew he wasn't judging him, anyway. All he cared about was how good everything felt, **so** good, and he couldn't think about anything else.

 

Veneziano pressed his lips to Romano's again, his voice taking on a slightly more seductive tone. "Go ahead."

 

It only took a few strokes from the toaster and a tug on his curl. Romano came, letting out a long, breathy moan. " _Ye-Yes..._ " His legs shook slightly as he was hit with wave after wave of pleasure and he let himself moan aloud with no shame.

 

As Romano came down from his high, he opened his eyes to see Veneziano watching him silently, lustfully. He was biting his lip as he looked his brother in the eyes.

 

"Did you like it?" He asked.

 

Romano shrugged, not actually wanting to answer such a blunt question. "Sure." His voice cracked. Veneziano was doing something with the toaster and he wasn't sure what but-

 

There was a click and Romano felt an intense pain. He let out a small yelp, quickly squeezing his legs shut in defense. But it was only Veneziano, who held the toaster up with a smile. Wait, what? Romano looked down to see the toaster was gone. He was free.

 

Veneziano noticed the other's confused look. "I found a button, see?" He pressed the button again, and some cum splattered up.

 

"Ew," Romano muttered, turning away. Wait a minute... "Couldn't you have just hit that **the whole time**?"

 

Veneziano squeaked. "Sorry, I didn't know!"

 

"Like I believe that."

 

"Why didn't _you_ press the button?" Veneziano pointed out. Romano fell silent and Veneziano grinned triumphantly. Romano just sighed.

 

"Anyway..." Veneziano set the toaster down on the floor, deciding they'd clean it up later. He scooted over to Romano, a submissive but incredibly lustful look in his eyes. "Can we continue now...?"

 

Romano snorted and without responding, wrapped his arms around his brother's waist to pull him closer. Veneziano sighed in bliss, leaning back so that Romano was on top of him. Romano deepened the kiss, pushing his brother's legs open and beginning to grind his knee against his erection. Then he suddenly stopped, sitting up quickly.

 

Veneziano sat up as well, looking confused. "What's wrong?" He was already panting softly.

 

Romano sighed. "We're not having sex on the kitchen floor."

**Author's Note:**

> im gonna go cry in the corner now  
> lets hope i dont get an anxiety attack and take this down :DDD  
> okay anyway cya


End file.
